Toolin' Around Jackson's Gold Country...

He's such a shorty! The "Construction Guy" Muffler Man standing in the parking lot at Sierra Equipment Rentals in Jackson, California has got to be the smallest I've ever seen. If I jump I could pop him in the nose. He has an incredible view of 49er Country, but his metrosexual eyes indicated to me that he'd probably much rather be standing over in San Francisco. Not that there's anything wrong with that.

Location: Sierra Equipment Rentals Jackson, CA.

Rapid City Muffler Man; Most Hygienic...

Probably the most well maintained and most hygienic Muffler Man in the world resides in South Dakota outside the Stamper Black Hills Gold Factory, just 2 miles South of Rapid City on Highway 16 on the way to Mount Rushmore. A full on "Cowboy Theme" replete with a Harley Davidson belt buckle and a Harley logo on his "shirt" he's cleaner than clean as he guards the jewelry factory with a huge pick-axe.
Picture submitted by Rockey (L) and Jeff (R).
Location: Stamper Black Hills Gold 7201 S. Highway 16 Rapid City, SD 57702 605-342-0751

The Malibu Muffler Man's Vendetta Platter...

"Poncho", The Muffler Man at La Salsa Restaurant in Malibu boasts a storied past. He once held a giant hamburger in his hands, but when the chosen cuisine switched to Mexican Food, the bottom bun was converted into a ready made platter for a hefty burrito and an ice cold cervesa.

It gets funnier from there. According to the former owner of International Fiberglas®, he asked his salesman to really push the installation of this figure since an ex-girlfriend lived in the apartment next door, and she would be forced to see this sour remembrance every day until she moved away.

Location: La Salsa Restaurant. 22800 West Pacific Coast Highway. Malibu, CA.

Willits Muffler Man; Hard to Find...

The Willits Muffler Man is a Cowboy, and as such, he's been assigned guard duty at the Willits Rodeo grounds. Climb the fence and you just might find a steaming "W" branded to your backside.

He's a little hard to spot, but he's there. He's on Commercial Street, East of Highway 101, across from the Mendocino County Historical Museum. Look behind the chain link fence of the little wild west town and you'll see him standing in front of the rodeo bleachers. If the gate is open, be sure to ask the rancher for permission to enter the grounds, out of courtesy.

Location: Willits Rodeo Grounds on Commercial Street East of Hwy 101.

My First Time with A Uniroyal Gal...

Patterned, or so they say, after Jackie Kennedy, I've been desperately tracking down my first "Uniroyal Gal" for some time. I've done two frustratingly unsuccessful trips to San Diego trying to quell the rumor of a Uniroyal Gal down by Highway 8. My current research indicates the fiberglass temptress from SD now resides within a bar in Mountain View, way up near San Francisco.

So, on my way to Yellowstone this year, I went for the "sure thing". I hopped off US Highway 15 and down Business 15, also called State Hwy 91, to Martha's Cafe in Blackfoot, Idaho. There she was! My FIRST EVER Uniroyal Gal!! Done up pretty with make up straight out of the 70's, white fingernail polish and holding a huge plate of french fries, I spent about half an hour looking up her skirt. Much to the chagrin of the many patrons inside the restaurant. Her watch is mysteriously set at 10 til 7. Dunno if that's startin' time or quittin' time, but hey, she's an Idaho blonde, and she looks like she's having fun no matter what time it is.

Location: Martha's Cafe in Blackfoot, Idaho

Greeley, CO; Muffler Man Shot with Arrow

There are many tales of Muffler Men, and even Uniroyal Gals being shot with arrows.

This is the first time I've ever witnessed the madness. What would possess a person to shoot an arrow at a defenseless fiberglass statue? What's the increase in testosterone production from hitting a stationary target? I've contacted the folks at Websters and they've agreed to leave a space open next to the definition of "dumb-ass" when they finally get a mugshot of the offending moron. The Greeley MM has multiple bullet holes in his legs and upper torso, accentuated by a strange bubbling forth of tiny rocks, which they must have poured into his hollow to keep him standing.

Also, there's a little confusion as to the actual location of this Muffler Man. I entered Greeley from the North, from Cheyenne, Wyoming. It was a GREAT ride, listening to XM Radio, a relatively new technology at the time of this blog.

The Greeley MM is said to be located on the corner of 5th at Hwy 85. Well, you want the BIG Hwy 85 that skirts the outer eastern edge of town, NOT "Business 85" which takes you into sleepy neighborhoods.

Location: Westview Auto Outlet 500 1st Avenue, Greeley, CO 80631 (970) 352-0420

Muffler Man; Idaho Springs, CO. DEBUNKED!

I spent the last couple weeks chasing down various leads on Muffler Men throughout the western United States. Riding my motorcycle sometimes 6oo miles at a clip to gather info for youse guys. Yeah...I'm obsessed.

Roadside America's Muffler Man Tracking Map lists an "uncomfirmed" Muffler Man in Idaho Springs, Colorado. I spent a good deal of time talking to locals and driving around town, showing them pictures of REAL Muffler Men.

I've come to conclude that there is NO Muffler Man in Idaho Springs.

Instead, what I found was a run down statue of a miner, found in a front yard about a mile up Highway 130 on the road to Mount Evans.

Muffler Man in Idaho Springs....DEBUNKED.